Oh Christmas

Is feeling melancholy and sad always going to go hand in hand with Christmas or will those feelings fade?

My first thought when I woke up was-"I need to call my mom!"

Sadness.

My brother and his family came over, that was nice. We had some food, drank some beer, played a few games. I actually had a really good time.

Didn't hear from Oldest-not sure what to think about that. Hurt mainly.

Spent Saturday driving around with all the other crazy people in town trying to hit the sales-it actually wasn't too bad, we were in and out of Best Buy with surprising speed.

Took Youngest to spend some of his Christmas money, then finally did a little something for myself and bought new clothes. I actually really needed a moment to think of me.

All in all, I'm glad Christmas is over.

Now to get all this happy crappy Christmas shit out of the house.

Happy happy!

Merry Christmas!!

Finally!

I swear I've been looking forward to this day for a long time! It's my last day at work-then 5 days off, 2 on, and 5 more off.

I need this break! I worked my ass off all weekend, and I've overloaded on cookies, which has just left me feeling exhausted.

I only have a few more gifts to buy which I will do tomorrow, then I am officially DONE.

Can't wait!

It's A Christmas Miracle!!

Youngest wanted snow.....





He got snow!!

Bah hum....oops, I mean.....

Merry Christmas!!

Back Among The Living

Barely, but here I am.

We went to Hubbs Christmas Party Saturday night, and we looked smoking hot if I do say so myself. I was still a little sick, but beer helped that feeling. It was a little uncomfortable because we didn't really know anybody, then we ended up at a table with the owner and his wife. Nice people, but we were very nervous. We had a nice dinner, gambled for a minute (my $20.00 a year habit)then left.

We decided to stop by our old favorite dive bar on the way home, still dressed to the nines. We ended up staying out until 3:00 am! So not like us, I'm usually in bed by 11pm, even on weekends. Had a few million beers, a couple shots of some nonsense, then dragged our butts home.

Needless to say I felt like death warmed over yesterday, but it was family movie day so nothing much was required of me.

Today and tomorrow are half days for me at work, then I'm off until the 29th. I'm very much looking forward to spending some time at home with the family. My bro and his family are coming over for dinner and gift exchange on Wednesday, and I think I'm going to have Little Wing and her family over for lunch this week. "Aunt" C (My mom's best friend) is coming over for dinner tomorrow with her boyfriend, and Youngest is going to play "Pretty Woman" for them on his guitar.

The only thing that could make this week better is if Oldest lived close enough to visit. Other than that,I'm pretty happy with the way things are.

What are your holiday plans?

Come To The Darkside......

We have cookies!!!

Snickerdoodles



Russian Tea Cakes



And my favorite, Rum Balls!!!



Can you tell by the last pic I was starting to get tired? I baked for 10 hours on Saturday! And I have no idea why that pic is turned sideways.

Cookie Day!

Tomorrow is cookie day. I love holiday baking-this year I’m making Rum Balls, Snickerdoodles, and Russian Tea Cakes. Yum…..Not very diet friendly, but if I work out for 9 hours I should be ok…...

I also have to take Youngest shopping for his Grandma, then ship a few packages next week and I am officially done.

I'm feeling pretty good about Christmas this year, which is a nice change. I'm usually depressed. Last year was my first Christmas without my mother, so now that all those "firsts" are out of the way my holiday should go much smoother. Not that I won't still miss her, but it isn't as traumatic as it was last year.

I think part of the reason I'm feeling better this year is we've been donating whenever we can. We bought a bag of food for a local family at the grocery store, we've donated to Toys for Tots, and Little Wing and I dropped off pet food at the Humane Society. We are also participating in a local pet food drive for homeless pets, and for the elderly that may not be able to afford pet food right now.

Wow-did all that just come from me? Am I turning-dare I say it-nice???

Don't let word get it. It will ruin my reputation.

I'd Like To Thank The Academy.....

I'm grateful for my husband. I am the luckiest woman in the world to have found someone who knows all about me, has seen me at my physical and emotional worst, and yet still loves and adores me. He has never once laughed at me. I love you Hubbs.

I'm grateful for my Oldest. I feel blessed that he has decided to maintain a relationship with me even though I was not the best mother. He has grown in to a fine man in spite of his upbringing. Thank you son. You make me proud.

I'm grateful for my Youngest. He is respectful and polite, and he laughs at my jokes. He helps out when needed, he eats my tofu burritos without complaint, and he thinks I'm pretty. Thank you child.

I'm grateful for my brother. He has saved me from some crazy situations. He picks me up, brushes me off, and shoves me back out the door to try again. He is the father I never had. Thank you.

I'm grateful for the women who chose to marry in to my family. I know it's tough, we are all basically insane. But I think if you look at how we were brought up, you realize that we're actually doing damn well. You are both good women. Thank you for sticking around.

I'm grateful for the 2 cutest grandchildren in the world. Seeing their cute little faces makes me smile, and I love the fact that I'm a grandmother.

I'm grateful that my brother and I are actually leading healthy, productive lives. We are not repeating the cycle, and that is a miracle. We win.

I'm grateful for Little Wing. We finish each other's sentences, communicate without speaking, and she loves me, psychoses and all. Thanks for being there chickie.

I'm grateful for my in-laws. Mother, Brother, Sister-you are all such kind hearted, good people. You've helped me when I needed it and have never judged me. Thank you.

I'm grateful that I was able to care for my mother when she was dying, and I was holding her hand when she finally passed. I love you Mom, and I miss you every day.

I'm grateful for my job. It's like one big happy dysfunctional family, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

I'm grateful for my health. I have a few issues, but nothing that can't be dealt with.

I'm grateful I'm able to provide good food, a warm home, and a loving atmosphere for everyone who passes through my door.

I'm grateful for finally realizing that what happened to me in my past, and the resulting bad choices I have made, do not make me a bad person. I couldn't have done that without the people I love.

I'm grateful for the friends I have made in the blogging community. You make me laugh, you give me hope, and you let me know I am not alone. Thank you.

I'm (learning to be) grateful for every wrinkle, stretch mark, and scar. My body has served me well-it's given me 2 wonderful children, and it keeps on ticking in spite of all the abuse I have inflicted on it.

And finally, I'm grateful that I have learned to laugh at myself, appreciate what I have, and speak up if there is something I need. I spent far too many years being silent, and I don't have to do that anymore. I have a voice, and I deserve to be heard. I not only know this, but I believe it.

Happy Thanksgiving. I hope everyone reading this has the best day ever!

Done!

So....tired......picture....quality....bad.....

The lemon bars ended up being a learning experience. You're supposed to add the butter until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs, but I got impatient and it turned into a big dough blob. I tried to use it anyway-



Then I realized that was completely lame,threw the dough in the trash, and started over.



More crumb like, no? After baking-



Youngest helped with the powdered sugar-



They look like hell, but my god, they are GOOD! Recipe here.

And finally, Youngest and I finishing the sugar cookies. Hubbs found it hilarious that I had a flour hand print on my booty,so I thought I'd share.



Now, off to brine the turkey, make guest beds, cook dinner, sjfihuh.....sorry, fell asleep there.

Happy Thanksgiving Eve!!

She CAN Bake A Cherry Pie!

Holy cow I did it. Granted, it was with all store bought ingredients, but still.
There is no real recipe-just grab 2 cans of cherry pie filling and 2 ready made pie crusts.



This is where it got difficult. I decided to make a lattice top-not easy.



Even with instructions, which I found here, it was still a little confusing.




Frustrating! It's a little uneven-I prefer the term 'rustic'. I brushed it with milk, sprinkled it with cinnamon and sugar-




And voila!



Not bad, not bad at all.

Up next-lemon bars!

So Far, So Good!

I have been busy busy busy! Come on, let's take a look at my progress.

Here's how my kitchen table usually looks. There's Cleo, waiting for dinner.



The table was made in 1890-something. We got a hell of a deal on it. It has three leaves, so it can expand to 6 feet.



Is that beautiful or what?



Here it is this morning, with all my baking ingredients. And yes, I used store bought pie crust. Give me a break-I'm new to this baking nonsense! Hard to believe I'm going to turn all that stuff into delicious treats.



The first thing I made was a pecan pie. (Recipe here-thanks Pioneer Woman!)Here it is prior to baking, looking like an ooey, gooey mess.



Finished product! I know the crust is kind of wonky, but it looks delicious!




By the way, in between pies I made the most delicious mashed potatoes I have ever had in my life. And you can make them the day before, then pop them in the oven when the turkey's almost done. Recipe here. And again, thanks Pioneer Woman!



They are truly the best mashed potatoes I have ever made. I had no idea that using a hand mixer was not the preferred method of making good mashers. I got quite the workout mashing those bad boys!

Up next-cherry pie!