Book Review

Rough Weather by Robert Parker

As I've said before, I've been reading Parker since I was 16 years old. He's an old favorite, and I generally enjoy his books.

This was a very fast read-I don't know if it's because of the large print or what. But it was an ok story. Not a bad way to pass the time.

What Now?

I have been trying to be more aware of myself and my moods. What sorts of things set off my depression, why do I get so angry and irritable, etc….

I woke up this morning (after sleeping very well) and did not want to get out of bed. Part of it was I was so warm and comfortable, but once I got up it just felt like it was too much. Too much effort required to get ready for work, to show up at work and actually be productive. I don’t know why-things went well this weekend, and we had an excellent family day yesterday. I’m not hung-over and I did sleep well.

It’s such a pain in the ass dealing with myself sometimes, I swear. Why can’t I just wake up and feel happy? Why does there always have to be some sort of moodiness ruling my day?

Apparently I’m feeling a tad sorry for myself-I will take the advice “Fake it till you make it”. I will pretend all is well until I start feeling it today. I will try to make today a good day.

Random Thought

I was just outside sweeping leaves, and I thought about how much I love my life right now, and how many times in the past I tried to end it.

It seems weird now-I have such a profound fear of death, and a strong love of life. But there were times, my God. I've taken so many pills, and had so many stitches in my arm. I see the scars as a daily reminder to appreciate and love this life I'm in.

Busy, Busy

I'm pretty sure I ate my body weight in sushi yesterday. Afterwards, all I could do was flop on the couch and catch up on my "Weeds" episodes.

Today is Fall cleaning day. In preparation of winter I like the house to be as clean as possible-it makes for quicker weekend jobs.

So far I've cleaned both bathrooms, done 3 loads of laundry, went grocery shopping, cleaned the ceiling fans, changed the bedding, and threw out about 3 years worth of clutter.

Hopefully I've burned off at least one of the sushi rolls!

Sushi Day!

Hubbs, youngest, and I are going out for sushi when Youngest gets home from school. Birthday sushi-it's been a week long celebration!

I took today off of work, which allowed me to stay up late last night and play on the internet. It was nice to stay up as late as I wanted without worrying about the million things I have to do the next day. Even on weekends I don't stay up late because there is always something to do the next day. I grocery shop very early in the morning on Saturdays to beat the crowds. But today, I'm free until Hubbs gets home at noon.

Lounging around, some alone time with Hubbs, then sushi with the family. The perfect day!

Yes, You. Beautiful You.

Remember?

When your parents divorced, and your mom promised that everything was going to be better now?

One of my favorite bands-