Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Dumbfucker

My therapist recommended a book to me, "The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook". It's already been quite helpful in teaching me to control my emotions.

Yesterdays worksheet was about values, and while I was filling it out I realized that alcohol is interfering with my values, which is resulting in me feeling bad about myself. As a wife, as a mother, as a person who cares about her health.

I hate it when I have these huge profound moments that have been right in front of my face the whole god damn time.

Anyway, trying AGAIN. Aiming for a sober weekend with the family.

The reward (besides the obvious) will be a family dinner out next Friday night. I do love going out to eat.

Besides that, I'm sick (still), my eye is infected (again), and I'm quite bitchy. I would like to just feel like a normal human being for a quick minute instead of this congested eye infected GOON.

1 comment:

Sunshine said...

Now I know why I haven't stopped reading this blog since I stumbled onto it. At first it was because I was positive you were a fanfiction writer I adored. You might still be that person, but now I know I'm engrossed and nodding my head because we're both (presumably) borderlines. What a lovely and fucked up thing it is. I won't bore you with books to read; you've likely read them. When I read your words it is like reading my own...up and down, hot and cold, happy and desperately depressed. Don't stop writing. Sometimes it's the only lucid, eloquent outlet you have.