As if it were that easy. I have serious self esteem issues, as well as serious body image issues. I have people telling me I'm too thin, but I just don't see it. After losing 20 pounds, all I see is the fat that remains on my hips and thighs.
After losing 20 pounds, I have also realized that I am INCREDIBLY flat chested when I am thin. So much so, that I had planned on getting my breasts done this year. I mean, I was committed to doing it. All I could think about was what size would I get, and all the new clothes and bathing suits I would buy.
Then I thought, "Lula, what the FUCK is wrong with you?"
I am almost 40 years old, and have nursed two children. My breasts are bigger than Kate Hudson's, and she's ....cute. Not beautiful, but cute. I'm sure there are beautiful flat chested women out there. Oh wait, there's one now. ME.
I refuse to feed in to society's idea of beauty. I refuse to insert foreign objects in to my body to fill out a bikini better. I refuse to spend $5000.00 on vanity when in this economy, I'm lucky I have a job. I refuse to try to figure out where the hell I was going to get $5000.00 in the first place when I can't even afford to buy the types of groceries I want. (Swordfish steaks, anyone?)
I promise to try to accept myself, flaws and all. I promise to try to see myself as I actually look.
I promise, I will never get a boob job.
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