Life frickin sucks right now. I’m so frustrated and bitchy I can barely stand myself. And this is one of those times when identifying the problem does nothing to help solve it.
I sprained my shoulder last Sunday, and lucky me! I was fortunate enough to do it the month we are without insurance coverage. I believe the doctor I saw was an inept fool (who is charging me $1000, by the way), so I’ve been turning to the internet for advice. Doing this has done two things.
1. convinced me that the doctor I saw was a quack
2. freaked me out because of course I think I’m much worse now.
I also have not had a drink since Saturday. Which I guess is a good thing to come out of all of this, but it is wreaking havoc with my emotions. I have been on pain pills all week, so it hasn’t really been that hard, but today I decided to just quit the pills cold turkey. And I hate everything as a result.
I hate that my right arm is basically useless.
I hate that my car is a stick.
I hate that I needed to get a ride to work this morning.
I hate that I don’t have a ride to work tomorrow.
I hate that I need my husbands help to get dressed every morning.
I hate that my 12 year old son has been doing my hair every morning.
I hate that gravity hurts.
I hate that I have used all my sick days.
I hate that it’s taken me almost 15 minutes to type this.
I do realize I should be grateful that I have people willing to dress me and drive me around. It doesn’t mean I can’t hate it at the same time.