I have never slept well. I have trouble falling asleep, I have trouble staying asleep, and when I am lucky enough to go to sleep, I have nightmares. This has been my sleep pattern for at least 20 years. In between the emotional issues and the fact that I wake up to pee at least 3 times a night, it’s amazing I am able to function at all.
I haven’t mentioned this yet because I didn’t want to hex it, but here goes.
I have slept through the night the last 7 days. In a row. Slept through as in slept solidly from 9:30-10:00 pm until 4:30-5:00 am. I woke up one night at 11:30, went to the bathroom, and went right back to sleep.
It is a miracle. I truly don’t remember the last time I slept through the night. The occasional night here and there (VERY few and far between), but 7 days in a row?
I would like to say it’s because I quit drinking, but I slept through the night after Virginia City the other day, and we did drink. I don’t know what’s causing it, but I am very happy. I wake up in the morning and I’m not pissed off because it’s time to get up already. I would like to stay in my warm bed and cuddle my husband a bit longer, but the anger is GONE.
And I haven’t been taking tranquilizers either, (That word cracks me up. Here, take one of these. You will be TRANQUIL. They should be called Numbilizers) though I did take a quarter of one last night. It felt like one of those nights where I was going to lay in bed and every mistake I have ever made in my life was going to be replayed before my eyes. Which it was, until I dropped off about 10pm. I was actually planning what I was going to do at 12:00 am if I was still awake, then-out. Like a light.
I did have another strange dream. Something about Hubb’s telling me “Well, I can KISS”. As in another woman. I woke up this morning and the first thing I said was “I don’t understand why you have to be so mean to me in my dreams.” Weird, because I trust him more than I have ever trusted another person in my life.
Here’s to night #8.